drowning in tear drops
every time i go to dream.
who knew sighs could form
such lonely puddles of trust.
So much for long goodbyes,
there's only a train ride home.
past whispers of sweet nothings,
are empty shells of what have been.
you cut your brown hair,
and shed light on the real you,
but closed your glowing eyes,
till you could look away.
Because there's a new cause,
though I may have been a first,
but no moral has been wasted,
just a couple thousand kisses.
and thats just another thing i miss,
the beautiful lips that let words slip,
smoothly forming shapes of love,
putting others words to shame.
Its become so wrong to love you,
when i've already lost this war.
I don't see the beacon of hope,
that would tell me to keep fighting.
So where'd your love go?
and why did it fade away?
was it a mistake,
or just my fault once again?
So i'm on the longest trip,
on a train thats not fast enough.
Wishing to watch the world blur past,
to let me sit and imagine other places.
Nature will take its own course,
only slightly moved by the train.
Showing just how unlikely we will ever
leave a footprint in this sand.
Walking through this beach,
in the middle of a storm,
theres no longer time,
to sift through memories with our feet.
Who said we couldn't try though,
this beach is not the one to kill us,
While we look back through those times,
we watched the sun become the moon.
And we watched the angels as they sang;
the steeples a shelter from us all.
They whispered "hallelujah" in my ear,
and flew away into the night--
but where'd they go,
and how'd they get there?
Is this a secret i'll never know,
or just a question i should ask them?
Cause further seems like forever,
when you're in the car thats leaving home.
You look back just to see his face,
midst the dirt roads' flown up dust.
But he's not waving a goodbye,
he's turned his back to you again,
cause those green eyes want something else,
and that heart's already gone.
So this long train ride's going nowhere,
i can't escape the love I feel.
A broken glass reflecting nothing,
but you wish for once it would.
Cause you can't see into the distance,
the mirrors' now a spider web of fears.
No longer useful to depend on,
the images can not be repaired.
A fan blows cold air towards you,
picks your face up from the glass,
you smell the one thing you remember
a hug clings to your wrinkled shirt.
that sweet scent is fading away,
like everything else it can not last.
The farther you can get from him,
the less you can see him in your mind.
And thats alright now,
cause you're not ready yet to face,
anything that lies beyond this train...
anything that lies beneath these tears.
I've tried for so long,
to conquer these dreams about angels,
but even in my sleep,
they're looking down upon me now.
their words echo in dark corners,
singing songs softly to me,
bittersweet lullabies,
etching warm tears into my face.
I lose the one I love,
and even my dreams frown at me,
Even they know that this train,
is a mistake for me to be on.
So what's a train ride home,
when you don't know home anymore.
What's this life really about,
when all we gain is a dead little tree.
Why didn't the tree,
bloom as it should have?
If only it hadn't drown,
swallowed in tear drops and trains.
Maybe then I wouldn't think,
that further seems forever.
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